I told his mother.

Today my bf's mother came in to visit. We spent the majority of the day sitting in an emergency dental office where my bf was having his wisdom tooth extracted. Yesterday he had tried to do this, but his dentist referred him to another clinic because the procedure was too involved for him to perform alone. This morning was hell, he was basically kicking and screaming that he didn't want to go. Since he keeps telling me that his daily drug use is because of the pain he is feeling, not going was not an option. Of course before we even got on a subway he "had" to make a stop in to see his friendly neighborhood drug dealer, bearing in mind that his mother was on her way to visit us.

The trip to have his tooth fixed took nearly all day, and his mother ended up meeting us at the clinic. Before he went in to be worked on he was pestering his mother to give him some pain meds (she has fibromyalgia). She said she would give him a few if he was in pain later on and if they didn't prescribe him anything. After he had been called in, his mother and I sat there chatting. One of her first questions she asked me was in regard to him and his usage of the pain medicine. Earlier in the year I had told her he was using heroin again (he hadn't in 7 years before this relapse and she was around for the first mess). We had tried to do an "intervention" for him, which none of us was truly prepared for and it was a big disaster. When his mom and stepfather showed up at our apartment unannounced on a Sunday with his best friend in tow, he immediately knew what was up. He slapped me in the face with all his might and ran out of the apartment. His parents were horrified. When his mother convinced him to return to calmly talk about it, he tried denying it all, telling them I was "crazy" and was just trying to make him look bad. That I make shit up. It was really sad. Eventually he did admit that he had a problem and convinced his family that he was going to take care of it. Privately he told me I was never, EVER to talk to his mother about his drug use again. He truly scared me and since then I never have.

Today though, since she brought it up first, I couldn't help from spilling it all out. I told her that he has been using frequently since the one month he quit for in the summer. I told her about his violent outbursts and the money he takes from me to support his habit. I told her that when she sends him money is goes right up his nose. Honestly she didn't seem that surprised. She said she has no sympathy for him and I shouldn't take this kind of shit. She suggested that I leave him and let him hit his bottom. She told me horror stories about the addicts in their family, including his father who no one knows if he's even still alive. She talked about his cancer and how he needs to be focusing on staying as healthy as possible and not destroying himself even more. It was all things I have said to him a million times, but it just felt good to hear the exact same words coming out of her mouth too. She said at this point if he continues to live that lifestyle she wants nothing to do with him either.

After the procedure was over and we left the clinic, my bf tried convincing his mother to mail him a bottle of oxycontin that she has at her house. She told him there was no way in hell she would put narcotics in the mail for him. He got very annoyed and raised his voice to her, arguing there was nothing wrong with it. They debated, he got more and more angry and she got upset. I just walked along in silence, shaking my head. He said he was upset because he was in pain and the doctor didn't give him an rx for anything "good". She gave him the pills she had on her. We had a peaceful late lunch and she left to go back home. As soon as she was gone he smiled and showed me a prescription for 40 Vicodins the doctor had given him. He makes me ill.

Tomorrow we go to Long Island to meet with his Endocrinologist about his biopsy results. They will then decide what treatment options he has for his cancer. The 3 pharmacies we went to tonight were out of Vicodin. I have a feeling getting him out of bed tomorrow morning at 6am will be no small task...
Wish me luck.